De-stressed

The one week holiday spent mostly at home has done wonders. I felt rested and light and a huge load of stress has been lifted. I woke up late, helped around in the farm, played with my daughter and did some chores. I basically had a laid-back week with the most important people in my life and it was very curative.
Now I'm back to work with a new level of vigour, inner confidence and strangely a new level of spirituality - more conscious of God and a desire to read the Bible and pray.
I've also stumbled on some writings on overcoming worry that basically encouraged me to take one day at a time and one task at a time and not sweat over what not able to be done (past) or what will have to be done (future) - just what I am able to do the best today.
Am also looking at eating a more proper and balanced diet. Only set back - getting very sleepy and heavy-headed again.

So far, so good

The last few days have been bearable - workload has lessen, some good things have happened and I even was wide awake yesterday till about midnight (a first after so many weeks!). I have had short moments of feeling positive and 'up' and have felt more 'able'. I am just so thankful to be out of the doldrums of depression these last few days or at least feel only slightly down. It's relieving.

"Hound" at bay and ideas to live by

I've been able to keep at bay the hound of depression by focusing on what I love - my family and reading - and I've made it through another week, telling myself I have Saturday to rest and Sunday to celebrate my daughter's birthday. The trip to the beach and the birthday party was worth the 5 day 'hardship slog' at school.
Found an old whiteboard of mine under an old bed at my mum's place and on it I had scribbled some wise sayings. Here they are:
1. A vision without the ability to execute, is probably a hallucination - Stephen M. Case (Reader's Digest, 2003)
2. Failure is the price you pay for success.
3. If you don't know what you want to be(come), your objective (in life) is to be a NOBODY.
4. Without a clear picture of how you wish your life to be, how on earth can you begin to live it?
I guess these kind of sayings catch my attention, I believe them and to a certain degree work hard to follow them.

You are sleepy . . .

I continue to feel very depressed. I feel my facial muscles being pulled down by heavy anchors that are hooked on to the ends of my downcast lips. I keep sighing, taking turns with every breathe exhaled. Most of all I find my mind switching off ever so often and deep sleep or an intense desire to fall into deep sleep coming over me - now even in the afternoons and ever more so in the late evenings. I find myself just wasting away, washed by a loss of desire, motivation, strength and ability to do much; even mundane duties like cooking dinner, lighting the oil lamps and turning off the generator have become tasks requiring Herculean effort. When will I be back in my strong, energetic, enthusiastic and hardworking body? Maybe time will tell . . .